Leslie Johnston [00:00:00]:
Welcome back.
Morgan May Treuil [00:00:02]:
Welcome back to Am I Doing this Right? We are your hosts, Morgan and Leslie.
Leslie Johnston [00:00:06]:
That's right.
Morgan May Treuil [00:00:07]:
And we are doing. We're doing great. Thanks for asking. I have an unpopular opinion. We actually kind of just talked about it earlier, and I'm curious what people think about this. I think that everyone's favorite chip. That is. They're actually too scared to tell people.
Morgan May Treuil [00:00:30]:
No, I'm being serious. I actually think that lots of people have a favorite chip, but they're ashamed.
Leslie Johnston [00:00:36]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:00:37]:
Because of culture and societal pressures and norms. To say that this is. To own that this is their favorite chip, and that chip is Funyuns. I do think that everyone loves Funyuns, but no one will own it and say they like. You like Funyuns.
Leslie Johnston [00:00:52]:
I hate Funyuns.
Morgan May Treuil [00:00:53]:
What do you hate about them?
Leslie Johnston [00:00:54]:
They're so gross.
Morgan May Treuil [00:00:56]:
But what's gross about them?
Leslie Johnston [00:00:57]:
They open them up and just the smell is everywhere. And they're like, see, this is why people won't say that they like onions. Are they, like, onion rings? Is that kind of what they are? They're like.
Morgan May Treuil [00:01:06]:
I don't know what they taste.
Leslie Johnston [00:01:07]:
Part of an onion ring, which. I should like that because one time when I was little, I remember trying to order onion. Onion rings without the.
Morgan May Treuil [00:01:17]:
You're like, can I just get the. The. I knew you were gonna say that. I either thought you were gonna say I ordered onion rings and ate the crust off of the onions and put it back.
Leslie Johnston [00:01:26]:
That's what I did when they told me I couldn't get it without.
Morgan May Treuil [00:01:30]:
Like, can you just give me the crust of the onion ring? That's honestly genius.
Leslie Johnston [00:01:35]:
What's the weirdest thing that you used.
Morgan May Treuil [00:01:37]:
To order at a restaurant as a kid that your parents would let you do? Because they were like, I'm not even gonna challenge them. Is it that.
Leslie Johnston [00:01:45]:
That's probably the craziest that I tried to order.
Morgan May Treuil [00:01:47]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:01:47]:
What about you?
Morgan May Treuil [00:01:48]:
My parents used to take us to this Mexican food restaurant called El Rincon. They used to call it the Rat. I'm not sure why it's gross now that I think about it. And I hated going to this restaura restaurant because I didn't like Mexican food at the time. I love it now. But I used to order. They would. They would bring out a little packet of shredded cheese for me, and I would just sit there and eat shredded cheese out of this little packet.
Morgan May Treuil [00:02:13]:
And it never came on a plate. It always came in, like, a little packet. I don't know. Not like a package, but, like, almost like if you were to get, like, a packet of fries, that's what it came in. Yes. But it was, like, the kind of cheese that you melt for queso, so it was so freaking good. And I would. My parents would be eating, like, tacos, enchiladas, fajitas, and I'm just, like, slamming shredded ch.
Leslie Johnston [00:02:34]:
Keep the shredded cheese coming.
Morgan May Treuil [00:02:37]:
And I would probably so many, like, stomach issues. But, yeah, that was the weirdest thing that I ate. But, yeah, I think that Funyuns are actually good, but no one's allowed to say. And I think that they're widely liked. But no one's allowed to say that they like them because there's so much shame.
Leslie Johnston [00:02:52]:
Funyuns should have the same shame as, like, opening a bag of corn nuts on a drive.
Morgan May Treuil [00:02:58]:
Yeah, corn nuts are gross. Like, ranchy and gross.
Leslie Johnston [00:03:01]:
Smell of corn nuts is like, the same smell as Funyuns.
Morgan May Treuil [00:03:06]:
There's so much pressure on food, though.
Leslie Johnston [00:03:08]:
I know.
Morgan May Treuil [00:03:09]:
Sucks that you can't like what you want to like because everyone's just watching and judging, smelling it.
Leslie Johnston [00:03:14]:
I know.
Morgan May Treuil [00:03:14]:
That's true.
Leslie Johnston [00:03:14]:
There is a lot of shit. You know what? That is kind of annoying, actually. It's like, so your taste. Everyone's taste buds are different. Yours like Funyuns or those weird.
Morgan May Treuil [00:03:24]:
See, you can't even say that because it's just gross.
Leslie Johnston [00:03:26]:
You like weird Frito barbecue Fritos that you like.
Morgan May Treuil [00:03:29]:
The twisty ones. Oh, so good. Barbecue twist Fritos. They're good.
Leslie Johnston [00:03:34]:
Oh, but Fritos, it's like, I don't know. Maybe I'm. I'm part of the problem.
Morgan May Treuil [00:03:38]:
Has the Internet heard of all dressed chips yet?
Leslie Johnston [00:03:42]:
Oh, I think if you're Canadian, you know what all dressed is.
Morgan May Treuil [00:03:44]:
Well, I feel like I'm getting an orientation right now for the first time because we keep having them at our barbecues that we have.
Leslie Johnston [00:03:49]:
I know. I'm like, who's bringing the old dress?
Morgan May Treuil [00:03:51]:
They're good. They're a combination. You know what they are? They're a combination of barbecue ketchup. Ketchup. Sour cream and onion, salt and vinegar.
Leslie Johnston [00:04:00]:
Ooh. See, I love a sour cream and onion chip.
Morgan May Treuil [00:04:02]:
How are. I do, too. That would be my, like, my choice.
Leslie Johnston [00:04:07]:
Next time you're at gardening.
Morgan May Treuil [00:04:08]:
How come those are acceptable?
Leslie Johnston [00:04:10]:
I know. Why is that? Sour cream and onion is kind of like, oh, I have an elevated palate.
Morgan May Treuil [00:04:14]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:04:14]:
But if you want Funyuns, then. Which is basically onion.
Morgan May Treuil [00:04:19]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:04:19]:
Then you're like. You're dirty.
Morgan May Treuil [00:04:21]:
You're. You're a dirty rat. And everyone hates You. And you're gross. You're feral if you eat Funyuns. But sour cream and onion, it's like you're sophisticated and elegant.
Leslie Johnston [00:04:30]:
That's so true. I know.
Morgan May Treuil [00:04:33]:
Crazy. I.
Leslie Johnston [00:04:34]:
Well, it's kind of. The whole food thing is funny because everybody's taste buds are so different that like, I used to eat super plain growing up. I guess that was my weird thing. Like we would go through my poor mom going through like the McDonald's drive through. It was like, can I have a burger? Just with the. Just with the meat, nothing else. And then it was like one with just lettuce and that and whatever. And so.
Leslie Johnston [00:04:55]:
My poor mom. But I would get made fun of growing up because they're like, ew. You don't put like ketchup or cheese or whatever on your burger. So I get roasted for eating really plain. And then I'm like, why am I getting roasted? I'm eating less things on my food than.
Morgan May Treuil [00:05:10]:
That's weird that you would get roasted for flavors. Plain things. Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:05:13]:
Oh, yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:05:13]:
Because like, plain is just so.
Leslie Johnston [00:05:15]:
I don't eat that way anymore. But yeah, now I've seen the light. So now I roast people who eat.
Morgan May Treuil [00:05:20]:
Food is such a personal thing. It is ordering in front of people or like bringing your own snacks to something. It's just. Or like, oh, we were talking about this other night. Cooking for people.
Leslie Johnston [00:05:31]:
Oh, yes. So stressful.
Morgan May Treuil [00:05:32]:
Very vulnerable. Very stressful.
Leslie Johnston [00:05:34]:
I'm always like, it's bad, it's bad. And then I give it to them.
Morgan May Treuil [00:05:36]:
And I'm like, yeah, but what were you making the other night that we were like, oh, this is so vulnerable. Like, what was that?
Leslie Johnston [00:05:42]:
Yeah, what was that? It wasn't. It wasn't the ground beef tacos?
Morgan May Treuil [00:05:45]:
No, cuz not everybody ate that.
Leslie Johnston [00:05:47]:
What was I cooking?
Morgan May Treuil [00:05:49]:
I don't know, but we were. We were like, remember this? Like, this is so vulnerable.
Leslie Johnston [00:05:52]:
Chicken salad.
Morgan May Treuil [00:05:52]:
Cook for someone. No, I don't know where we were, but we were talking about how like, yeah, it's so vulnerable. Like you put your heart and soul into cooking something and then people try it and you have to like, watch them try it and you don't know if they like it or not. And then it just be nice.
Leslie Johnston [00:06:06]:
Was it the queso?
Morgan May Treuil [00:06:07]:
It was the spinach artichoke 4th of July. And it was a.
Leslie Johnston [00:06:11]:
That's cuz it got roasted for being too icy or something.
Morgan May Treuil [00:06:13]:
Which is funny because it's so annoying because you. You are like, I'm worried because the spinach is still frozen. It needs to sit in the fridge for longer, and we're all like, no, it's totally fine. And then Benji walks over, and he's like, whoa, do you need an ice pick for this spinach? He just, like, immediately calls out the one thing you said you were insecure about, and I'm like, so true. So annoying. But that's the story of my life.
Leslie Johnston [00:06:35]:
That spinach, it was good.
Morgan May Treuil [00:06:37]:
It was. So I ate it, and I had a couple frozen pieces, and it was good, so I don't care.
Leslie Johnston [00:06:41]:
And then Joey microwaved it, and I was like, this. You just took a frozen spinach and microwaved it? I'm not sure.
Morgan May Treuil [00:06:47]:
Everyone's trying to add their things to it.
Leslie Johnston [00:06:49]:
He added, like, shredded sharp cheddar, but.
Morgan May Treuil [00:06:53]:
No one ate it. It just.
Leslie Johnston [00:06:55]:
Just Joy, of course, is like, this is so good.
Morgan May Treuil [00:06:58]:
This is, like, so much better. You're like, no, it's not.
Leslie Johnston [00:07:03]:
That's funny. We could talk about food all day long. I love.
Morgan May Treuil [00:07:06]:
This should be a food podcast. This is honestly mislabeled. This should be a food po. Am I cooking this right? Is what we should. That would be a cool thing.
Leslie Johnston [00:07:13]:
Am I cooking this right to do? We could just make that this episode. Everything we've made recently and what you did and why it was so good and how people should try it.
Morgan May Treuil [00:07:22]:
Should we?
Leslie Johnston [00:07:23]:
I don't care. We can.
Morgan May Treuil [00:07:27]:
Do people care about that?
Leslie Johnston [00:07:28]:
Probably not.
Morgan May Treuil [00:07:31]:
Maybe we do it for the next one if we feel like people actually care.
Leslie Johnston [00:07:33]:
Okay, if you guys care, let us know and we'll do one about that.
Morgan May Treuil [00:07:37]:
I'm so down.
Leslie Johnston [00:07:37]:
Morgan has an Instagram called Morgan's Rex.
Morgan May Treuil [00:07:40]:
Yeah, I need to change the name.
Leslie Johnston [00:07:41]:
It used to be called Matey Food.
Morgan May Treuil [00:07:44]:
I tried to. I tried to, like, make a thing called, like, made food. Like, I made food.
Leslie Johnston [00:07:52]:
But your last name is stupid.
Morgan May Treuil [00:07:53]:
My last name was so I spelled it like M A Y D E food. That was the handle. And everyone was like, maybe food. And I'm like, no, it's. It was so stupid.
Leslie Johnston [00:08:04]:
It was the longest that, like, something is gone where, Like, Morgan thinks it's made food this entire time.
Morgan May Treuil [00:08:11]:
Yeah, because we all lived together at.
Leslie Johnston [00:08:12]:
The time, and the entire time, I thought it was at a. People thought, like, she was like, oh, may D food.
Morgan May Treuil [00:08:20]:
Like, I was like, a Frenchman. Like, I can play on words.
Leslie Johnston [00:08:25]:
Made the food. So now, to this day, we're always like, where's made the food?
Morgan May Treuil [00:08:32]:
That is so. I can't. That is so funny. Like, you. I completely translated it as one thing. And you guys were like, seeing it as something else that's embarrassing. I can't even talk about it without being embarrassed. Okay, today we are talking about something that we have both said recently is affecting us.
Leslie Johnston [00:08:49]:
Tired.
Morgan May Treuil [00:08:51]:
We are so tired. And unmotivated.
Leslie Johnston [00:08:55]:
Yes.
Morgan May Treuil [00:08:55]:
And feel no drive towards anything in life.
Leslie Johnston [00:08:59]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:08:59]:
And we are concerned.
Leslie Johnston [00:09:02]:
I. I thought it was just me until today.
Morgan May Treuil [00:09:04]:
I thought it was too. I'm like, maybe I'm depressed.
Leslie Johnston [00:09:07]:
I went into Morgan's office and I was like, I'm so tired. Actually, I think you said it first. And I was like, wait, you're tired too? I don't know what it is. And we just saw literally one of the video guys, my brother, and he's like. He even said he's like, I don't even like, want to play guitar right now. Which is like what he's so good at. And literally like part of his job online and all this stuff is to do that. And I'm like, oh, if you're okay now I'm feeling like this might be like a.
Leslie Johnston [00:09:33]:
There's something community wide thing.
Morgan May Treuil [00:09:35]:
Well, I think there's. So there's like one. There's one aspect of exhaustion where you're like, I feel so tired physically, I want to sleep all the time. I am just feeling really down. Then there's this other sort of level of exhaustion that I'm feeling where I'm like, I don't feel. It's kind of what you just described. I don't feel motivated.
Leslie Johnston [00:09:54]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:09:54]:
Towards anything right now. Like, I don't feel motivated towards work. It's pulling teeth right now to get me to create something. All the stuff that I used to love, where I love working. I love it. And I don't know if there's maybe like, I'm assuming if we're all feeling this way, then maybe there's something about this point in summertime where we're all just dragging after a full year of working.
Leslie Johnston [00:10:19]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:10:19]:
But yeah, I was starting to get freaked out because I was like, I have no motivation towards anything, like, to get me right now to clean the house, to do laundry, pulling teeth. But then even the stuff that I love to do, like, I've had to prep a bunch of messages over the past couple of weeks. And it's like even that I've had to force myself to sit down. And it's. It's taken me like twice as long as it usually does because my. My brain's not in it. My motivation isn't in it. And it just had me kind of questioning, like, am I Bro, is something wrong with me where I'm just not.
Morgan May Treuil [00:10:51]:
I'm not producing anything right now. I feel like just a bum.
Leslie Johnston [00:10:54]:
Well, and that can't be good news for you. You are producing a human being right now, so you have that excuse. I have no excuse.
Morgan May Treuil [00:11:01]:
I'm like, I guess that's my one consolation prize is that I am producing something.
Leslie Johnston [00:11:05]:
But no, I feel very similar. Like, I don't know if it's the summer and it's hot and it's allergy season somehow still forever and ever and ever. And it's like we just came off. At least for me. It felt like we've been going nonstop since May. Like May. We had our massive Thrive conference, which was so fun. And we were just like grinding to get to that.
Leslie Johnston [00:11:30]:
And then I think my mistake. I was thinking about this yesterday. So I went from that to like, maybe took like a couple days off. And then I tried to. Instead of going, I'm gonna take like a solid week off and just relax and like reset my brain. I had like a couple like weekend trips and I was like, ooh, I'm just gonna spread it out. Like, I'm gonna do a couple weekend trips here and there and then I'll just spread out kind of that like post event vacation time.
Morgan May Treuil [00:11:59]:
Yep.
Leslie Johnston [00:12:00]:
And that I just don't think was. I don't think it did it for me.
Morgan May Treuil [00:12:03]:
That is true. Actually. You haven't really.
Leslie Johnston [00:12:05]:
You've.
Morgan May Treuil [00:12:06]:
You've been places, but you haven't retreated. I don't feel like you've. And I feel the same way for myself. I feel like I've. I've been away from work for different. Different things basically since this. Since January, like since Christmas is what we're talking about. Because before our Thrive conference, there was like an entire spring of stuff.
Leslie Johnston [00:12:25]:
Oh. Full of stuff.
Morgan May Treuil [00:12:26]:
So maybe that's the problem. Maybe. Maybe we didn't do vacation correctly this year because.
Leslie Johnston [00:12:33]:
Yes.
Morgan May Treuil [00:12:33]:
I feel like when you. And, and this is funny because we're actually both about to take real vacation for the first time since January.
Leslie Johnston [00:12:40]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:12:41]:
Which is probably normal. Like, people tend to vacation during the summertime. But I have been really excited. We're going to the beach for part of it. You guys are going to the lake. And I actually don't enjoy the beach that much. Like, to me, I'm like.
Leslie Johnston [00:12:56]:
Got a thing about sand.
Morgan May Treuil [00:12:57]:
Sand. And then it's like we're just sitting there. Usually I don't enjoy the beach that much. I'm actually really excited about this vacation because I Can't remember the last time that I unplugged and was just somewhere else. It's been a really long time.
Leslie Johnston [00:13:11]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:13:12]:
I think that probably you're probably on to something. I don't know that it actually helps you have a full reset to where you can get re. Energized towards work if you. If you don't have, like a real deal vacation where you unplug.
Leslie Johnston [00:13:26]:
Yeah. Well. And it can be anything. It's like life can get. I think what I'm realizing is. Cause you and I both, we love, Love to work, love to do stuff. Like out with friends. We love to at least, like, for me, like, I love doing stuff at my house.
Leslie Johnston [00:13:45]:
Like, I just got off the end of, like, a pretty big remodel.
Morgan May Treuil [00:13:49]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:13:49]:
And which I loved. Like, I loved all of it. I thought it was so much fun, but it kind of felt like I was in this big grind season where I'm like, doing the remodel while starting this new job at same place I worked, but different department, working up towards this massive event. And then it's kind of like, I think I've been beating myself up over a little bit the last, like, couple weeks. And then we went into kids camp and all that kind of stuff. And I think I came out of all that going. Like, I actually felt really motivated right after the Thrive conference ended and I was getting back into work. And I was actually surprised.
Leslie Johnston [00:14:27]:
I felt like I surprised myself by being like, oh, I don't actually. I don't think I need to take time off. Like, I actually feel good. I feel, like, energized to start, like, the next thing. And I went into that and just kept rolling and rolling and rolling and then realized, oh, you're right. I do think sometimes you need, like, a brain reset. It's like our bodies, we expect to keep up with, like, our ambition. And it's like, I actually think it's.
Leslie Johnston [00:14:53]:
What I'm learning is, like, it's such a gift that it doesn't.
Morgan May Treuil [00:14:55]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:14:56]:
Like, we think, oh, I'm gonna grind, grind, grind. Which there are seasons. You have to.
Morgan May Treuil [00:15:01]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:15:01]:
And there's seasons that, like, don't hear us in that word. This whole podcast is gonna be like a. Just say no to everything in your life and like, yeah, go on a really long vacation. Like, some people can't do that. But I think for me, I'm realizing, oh, my. I feel like my body, my mind is being like, you've been running on, like, very empty the last couple months, and you need like, if you don't stop and figure out a good rhythm for you in this season, then you're not going to get back to the grind season.
Morgan May Treuil [00:15:32]:
Well, no.
Leslie Johnston [00:15:33]:
So I think I'm trying to figure out, like, it's not as much like, finding a balance. I don't think you can find balance in life, honestly, but. But I think you can find seasons where it's like, this season right now, I think is actually not gonna be my biggest grind season. But, like, maybe God has something else in this season that he's wanting me to focus on. Not that I'm not gonna focus on, you know, finishing my house and working and all of that. Like, you have to do what you have to do.
Morgan May Treuil [00:16:00]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:16:01]:
But I'm just kind of wondering, like, is there a different area that he's trying to, like, highlight for me that I need to focus on?
Morgan May Treuil [00:16:08]:
So it's kind of an interesting point. The idea just popped in my head, and I don't know if this is real, but do you wonder if this, what we're feeling, is actually a season that we're meant to feel that helps us to get back? Like, we. We are, like, freaked out by it because we're like, oh, I don't usually feel this way.
Leslie Johnston [00:16:28]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:16:29]:
And we're trying to wish it away, but actually, this is one of the seasons that we're meant to sit in, because it's actually this season of feeling unmotivated, a little bit lazy, like, exhausted all the time, where we're meant to, like, live into that and then rally and get excited about, like, fall once it comes.
Leslie Johnston [00:16:50]:
Well, I feel like it's biblical. Like, are we running a race that God was never asking us to run at that speed all the time? Like, I think sometimes there are seasons where God's like, I want you to do. I have all these things that I want you to do and plan and figure out. And then there's seasons where he's like, I actually want you to not tie your whole identity to being, like, a hustle person and to maybe, like, slow down a bit, not give up your responsibilities, but, like, maybe you lean a little more on God than on yourself.
Morgan May Treuil [00:17:28]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:17:29]:
And I mean. Yeah, maybe for, like, especially for you. It's like your. Your season is going to really change with having a baby.
Morgan May Treuil [00:17:37]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:17:37]:
And so I wonder, maybe God is a little bit, like, okay, how can I. Yeah. Do something before that season?
Morgan May Treuil [00:17:45]:
You know, I've wondered in the past few weeks. This, like, second trimester of pregnancy feels like it's been more about being tired than it has any other symptom, which I'm actually really thankful for because coming off of just like lots and lots of sickness, I'm like, I can be tired forever.
Leslie Johnston [00:18:03]:
Like, I can, I can manage this.
Morgan May Treuil [00:18:05]:
Easily, sleep for the rest of my life and be fine. But I, I do kind of wonder because I don't, I don't feel like I've necessarily accomplished a bunch of things. And I, I think I, I was highlighted to this reality that I might be like an accomplishment oriented kind of person. And we've been in this, we've been in this se. Series of time where we haven't had consistent midweek programs for young adults because we're not in the fall. So we haven't had, you know, for a while it was like consistent numbers, consistent attendance, consistent salvations and baptisms. Something to track progress, right?
Leslie Johnston [00:18:39]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:18:39]:
And then when, you know, you're in the fall and you're in the spring, at least for us, you have these events that pop up or you get to either execute an event or you execute a talk at an event. And it's like, it's these big, you're building up to a something that happens and you feel the accomplishment come down afterwards and it motivates you for the next thing.
Leslie Johnston [00:18:59]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:18:59]:
And this chunk of time doesn't have any of that built into the calendar because it's summer. Now. Some people have summer calendar things. Like in our line of work, there are people that do build up to these summer events. They go really well and then they get to come down from it. But you and I at this point in our careers don't have like the summer. Like for you, it used to be breakaway. It was like you build up to breakaway, execute breakaway, which is our kids camp.
Morgan May Treuil [00:19:25]:
It goes really well. Then afterwards you get to have your come down, your release, your break from breakaway. And I don't have any of those things because our, our, our retreat doesn't happen until the beginning of the fall. And so I do kind of wonder like, oh, am I learning something about can do? I still feel fulfilled in purpose if what I'm doing doesn't have any roots in accomplishment or results. And I wonder if God's trying to like make me okay with that because I wonder if this next season I'm going into because of parenthood and learning that and being in the early stages of that. I wonder if accomplishment is not going to be able to be the measurement that I can use anymore to decide whether or not I'm doing a good job.
Leslie Johnston [00:20:14]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:20:14]:
And then it's like. But like, we obviously don't feel great about ourselves right now with accomplishment not being the measurable we can use. Like, we don't feel good about just like.
Leslie Johnston [00:20:26]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:20:27]:
Sitting. I honestly don't think that you and I sit very well at all. Like, even when we have like. Do you feel like you actually take a correct Good Sabbath on a weekly basis? No, I don't think so. For me, I don't think so either.
Leslie Johnston [00:20:42]:
Like, I take days off, but even that they're not necessarily like what I would think maybe would be like a Sabbath.
Morgan May Treuil [00:20:48]:
Yeah. Like, if you were to design your perfect. And I think it's different for everybody, but if you were to design like a perfect Sabbath rest day.
Leslie Johnston [00:20:56]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:20:56]:
For yourself, what would it. What would it have in it?
Leslie Johnston [00:21:01]:
Probably a whole lot less screen time.
Morgan May Treuil [00:21:04]:
Huh?
Leslie Johnston [00:21:05]:
I think sometimes I can just be like, oh, I have an hour. I'm just gonna like, lay on the couch and like, watch something or scroll TikTok or whatever. But yeah, it would probably be like, I love, like, I love baking. Like baking something. Spending time, like reading, spending time with God, like, being outside, being with friends. Like, that would be a great kind of Sabbath day. And like unplugging.
Morgan May Treuil [00:21:33]:
Do you feel like you have had. I'm not calling you out because I feel the same way about me, but like, do you feel like you've had a day where every. Because this idea of a Sabbath rest day is everything. Is that so it's not like, yeah, it was half that, but then the other half of it was all this other stuff.
Leslie Johnston [00:21:53]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:21:54]:
Like, I don't think hearing you say that, I'm like, I don't think I've had a Sabbath rest day which is meant to occur weekly.
Leslie Johnston [00:22:00]:
Yes.
Morgan May Treuil [00:22:01]:
Where the whole day was that.
Leslie Johnston [00:22:02]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:22:03]:
And there was no other stuff interspersed. Like, I have not had a day that wasn't partially infiltrated by a work need. And part of that is what we do because our work is so relational and ministry needs are not confined. Yeah, yeah, exactly. Nothing's confined to like a 24 hour period or like an 8 hour window. But I can't remember the last day that I had a day where it was like all that and not interrupted by anything. Like, I even had to catch myself. There's a phone call that I have to have that ended up getting like, almost scheduled for this next week when we're in Florida.
Morgan May Treuil [00:22:40]:
And I don't know why, in my brain I'm like, oh, it's fine. It's one phone Call. It's not a big deal. But I think that's the thing that makes us so tired. It's like. Yeah, we always think that it's, it's, it's not gradual. Right. Like, I'll know when I'm getting exhausted.
Morgan May Treuil [00:22:54]:
I don't know that you do. I think that you constantly make these little allowances.
Leslie Johnston [00:22:57]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:22:57]:
To your schedule and to your rest. That, that, like tumbleweed into this massive tumbleweed where all of a sudden you're exhausted. Because even your, Even your entire 24 hour Sabbath day where you say most of what I did was rest, but 10% of it wasn't.
Leslie Johnston [00:23:13]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:23:14]:
That's not a rest day.
Leslie Johnston [00:23:15]:
Oh. If I, I literally just had to say no to a similar thing, like a meeting that was on. Scheduled on vacation. And I was, I've literally been wrestling with this, like, okay, I need actually, like unplug for the week that I'm gone.
Morgan May Treuil [00:23:29]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:23:29]:
Like, I just, I, I know that if I, because I was tempted to be like, oh, maybe I'll hop on for this meeting and that meeting and whatever. And then I was like, you know what? I do kind of feel like God's being like, look, just unplug and see what I can do. I think sometimes we want to keep ourselves so busy and we're afraid that people won't need us anymore if we somehow, like, let someone else carry something for a second. But I think you're right. It's like, you gotta be able to take a step back and be like, oh, no, first of all, this all doesn't hinge on just me.
Morgan May Treuil [00:24:05]:
No.
Leslie Johnston [00:24:06]:
And I'm not actually that important to this whole thing. Going like, God's ultimately in control and I'm always afraid. Like, I feel like I need to recheck myself all the time because I'm a little bit of a people pleaser, that I will please the neediest people in my life. Instead of going, what do I want at the end of my life to look back on and be like, oh, I gave my top attention and time to these things. Am I doing those things right now in my life? Like, am I giving my attention to the things that really need it and the relationships or the things I'm building at work that I'm really excited about or that I feel like God's put on my heart? Or am I just doing the things that feel like, oh, well, this will please people if I do X, Y and Z. So it's like, that's always a good reminder. Like, is there a route to why you're feeling burned out. Like, are you just spinning your wheels doing the things that are people pleasing or are the things that are not that important, but they're the urgent.
Leslie Johnston [00:25:09]:
And then a year down the road you're like, oh, I haven't even been taking care of, like, maybe the relationships in my life or whether that's for somebody like their spouse or their kids or whatever, because they've been so consumed with, you know, grinding on this other stuff. And I don't know, I'm like, okay, what is in my life? Like, even though I don't like have kids yet in a family, like, I think it's. I don't like when people are like, well, grind everything out while you can before you have kids. Because then, like, you don't have, like, you can't do that later or something. I think that you can. Which the life you're living now you should like, even if you have to write it out. The level of importance for things like, this is top priority, this is second, this is third, this is fourth. And therefore, like, I'm going to actually plan out my week.
Morgan May Treuil [00:26:00]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:26:00]:
Putting those things in priority.
Morgan May Treuil [00:26:02]:
Yeah. I. I fundamentally disagree with the idea that you should do everything while you're single because when you're married or when you have kids, you can't do those things. I think who you're becoming in your singleness is who you will be and live into when you're Have a. When you have a family.
Leslie Johnston [00:26:17]:
Yeah. That's good.
Morgan May Treuil [00:26:18]:
And so all the things that you're forming in singleness are things that will carry over. You're not going to change all that much between those two things. So you have to build who you're going to be.
Leslie Johnston [00:26:25]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:26:27]:
I think that this. Oh, I. There was one. I was gonna say. What was it? It just left my whole brain. Dang it. It'll come back to me.
Leslie Johnston [00:26:37]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:26:38]:
What was the last thing that you said before I interrupted you? You were talking about not having. Not like you have to do everything.
Leslie Johnston [00:26:46]:
Yes.
Morgan May Treuil [00:26:46]:
In singleness.
Leslie Johnston [00:26:48]:
Yeah. Yeah. And not. And feeling like a priority list in your mind.
Morgan May Treuil [00:26:52]:
This is what I was going to say.
Leslie Johnston [00:26:53]:
Okay, good.
Morgan May Treuil [00:26:54]:
Cuz I. I think that. Again, this is not. I'm not. I don't want to make a political statement in this because there is no political statement in it. I was fascinated by the idea of the whole like, Doge thing. Not because I have any stance on it or I'm not even sure what it is, to be honest, but the idea was like, we're Going to go take inventory of basically everything we're spending money on and what's, what's worth it and what's not worth it. And where are we spending money? Where we don't need to be spending money.
Leslie Johnston [00:27:21]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:27:22]:
And I was fascinated by that because I, and I did this. I did kind of like a, like a DOGE exercise with our team, which was just like work, like work wise, like, kind of had everybody list out all the tasks that they were doing.
Leslie Johnston [00:27:36]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:27:37]:
And listed off like, what was the task accomplishing and why are you doing this? But, like, have to, you have to actually get to the bottom of why you're doing it. And so it was funny because a lot of the reasons for certain tasks were not motivated by good, like, ministry strategic reasons. They were motivated by, well, so, and so wants me to do that, or I thought you wanted me to do this. And, and some of that, like when you're talking to your boss is like, yeah, what your boss wants you to do is what you're gonna do.
Leslie Johnston [00:28:03]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:28:03]:
But I kind of wonder like, if I were to take an internal personal life inventory of what am I spending time and my energy on and are there places where it's going that it doesn't have to. Yeah. Or like places where it's going but it doesn't need to go there that much. I wonder how much I would get back. Like, I think there are things work wise where, because I've been hesitant to find a more efficient way of doing something, I'm spending more time on certain things that don't actually need my time or I mean, we call them out all the time. So I'll even say this, but like the idea that you touched on it a second ago. We have a friend who's been on the podcast, Jake Messner, who thinks that he is the essential piece to every gathering in his ministry that he does. And in his defense, like, there are teams in a lot of, like, transition and stuff.
Morgan May Treuil [00:29:01]:
So maybe, maybe he is essential for some things. But the idea that like, you're creating a team structure in which you're so you're, you're the pin that holds everything together. If you can't retreat, then everything falls apart. That is not, that's, that's not really setting yourself up for, for success. Like, and I don't actually think that's accurate. Like, do you need to be at every single thing that your job produces or do you need to be better at investing and discipling and creating other people? Training other people.
Leslie Johnston [00:29:37]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:29:37]:
Who can Be you when you're not there. Like, I was just talking to a person who was like, hey, can you help me troubleshoot this? Because I really want to come to Young Adults Retreat, but because of our team dynamic right now, I'm currently the only person on our team who can fulfill this role on the weekends. But I think we could find somebody, if we put our heads together, to come do it. And it's like, that's the mentality that we have to have where you're like, I'm not going to miss the chance to rest, to retreat, to get away, because I'm the only person that I think could be doing so. I do think that it's safe, smart to maybe even take, like, a personal inventory. And obviously, if you're a mom or a caretaker or a dad, a. A husband, a wife, whatever, and you have certain roles that you have to fulfill, I'm not saying drop those roles because they're not fulfilling to you. I'm saying within those roles, can you take a little bit of, like, inventory and stock and be like, are there places where I'm spending a lot of energy that I don't have to.
Morgan May Treuil [00:30:38]:
Where I could conserve some for myself? Is there ways you can structure your Sabbath to where you do actually have one fully uninterrupted day by work?
Leslie Johnston [00:30:52]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:30:53]:
And then with your vacations. Yeah. Like, can you restructure how those work to where you're not getting to the end of everything? And thinking, man, everything I just did that was meant to be for my rest was actually for the needs of other people. And none of it had me in mind.
Leslie Johnston [00:31:06]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:31:07]:
Cause you can't last that long that way.
Leslie Johnston [00:31:09]:
No. I also think when we get into that phase, when we're, like, so burned out and you're just, like, spinning your wheels, I think there's the temptation, at least for me. I'm always tempted to change everything. Like, okay, well, I'm stressed, or I'm not feeling this right now. So then I need to change this or I need to change that, or I need to quit this or I need to start this, I think, before. And I've learned this multiple times, like, in the last two years, where I. I've, like, gone to my, like, one of my friends and been like, you know what? I think I just need to totally change up everything. And.
Leslie Johnston [00:31:43]:
And they're smart enough to go, well, okay, wait, are you actually, like, taking care of yourself? Are you like, having a, like, a solid kind of like, Sabbath day? Have. Are you. Is there a root problem that's happening here that maybe you don't see or it's not popping up.
Morgan May Treuil [00:31:59]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:31:59]:
Because usually like a burnout's like a warning light for something. It's like, hey, pay attention to this because then the rest will become healthy. And so I would challenge anybody before you jump to like, maybe you're listening to this and you're like, I am burned out or I am not. Like, I'm not feeling fulfilled in my job or in my whatever. I'm just gonna like ditch the ship and jump somewhere else. Maybe before you do that, go, okay, what would I need right now to kind of do like a reset? Like maybe that is like taking a week off if you have the vacation time. Or it's just starting a Sabbath like once a week and it's locking your phone up somewhere and actually like letting your brain kind of relax for a day. Because I find in myself when I actually take care of myself and I get good time with friends, I get like refulfilled.
Leslie Johnston [00:32:51]:
I have conversations I need to have. I then go like, I love my job. I love what I'm doing, I love my whatever other things in life. And. And I find myself going, I'm so glad I didn't quit or I'm so glad I didn't do this because I actually do love this. But my body's just worn out, so I need to reset so that I can re enjoy it again.
Morgan May Treuil [00:33:15]:
Yeah, that's great.
Leslie Johnston [00:33:15]:
Cause you're not gonna. Don't ditch your family, don't ditch your people, don't ditch your job. Set yourself up for success and then maybe see what then maybe needs changing.
Morgan May Treuil [00:33:27]:
Don't be drastic.
Leslie Johnston [00:33:28]:
Don't make decisions when you're down.
Morgan May Treuil [00:33:29]:
No, I think two practical things I would do for the summertime, which feel one feels obvious, one maybe feels not obvious. And these are things that I'm going to do slash have started doing is for vacation. It's going to be a hard and fast rule. Like there I'm not. I'm. I'm uninterruptible on vacation. So like fully unplugging from work doing. I usually am pretty casual where I'm like, I'll leave, but I'm going to leave my phone on.
Morgan May Treuil [00:33:58]:
I don't really do like a do not reply on my email kind of thing. I just sort of am casual about it. I think I'm going to get really strict about it just because I never do. And I don't really think that I'm that needed to where I Can't take a week and go do something. I think the last time I probably did that was like a honeymoon. My honeymoon.
Leslie Johnston [00:34:15]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:34:15]:
So I'm going to do that. And the second thing, actually this is the more like counterintuitive thing for summertime is I actually find myself more exhausted and like I can't catch up if I'm sleeping really late. And right now I could probably, if I wanted to, I could sleep until like 11 o' clock probably, if I wanted to, because my body feels so tired and I want to give myself the ability to do that if I need to do that. But when you wake up earlier and then like spend time slower.
Leslie Johnston [00:34:48]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:34:49]:
You actually, even today as an example, I had to do the devo at Breakaway Sports Camp today.
Leslie Johnston [00:34:54]:
Oh, nice.
Morgan May Treuil [00:34:54]:
So I had to be here at 8. So I got up at like 6, got ready, came here early, worked on some stuff. By the time that it was 10, I had knocked out everything that I needed to do, work wise. And then all of a sudden everything has felt slower. Like my food choice felt more intentional, my water intake has felt more intentional. Like my conversations have felt better. Everything felt better because I didn't sleep until 9 o'. Clock.
Morgan May Treuil [00:35:19]:
Wake up scrambled and rushed everywhere. So I think your summertime tendency is like, I'm going to sleep so much this summer. What if inst. You had more awake hours doing less things and that was actually more restful than sleep. Still get your sleep. Yeah, But I'm just saying, do you need to sleep as much as you are sleeping? Because I think that that's like, we just tend to want to like veg by being not awake.
Leslie Johnston [00:35:44]:
Oh yeah. We think like a nap will fix this.
Morgan May Treuil [00:35:46]:
Yes. But being awake and vegging, then you actually remember that you got to veg, you know, exactly. Versus like sleep. You kind of just miss the day.
Leslie Johnston [00:35:55]:
Yeah. That's how I felt when I have actually gone on walks in the morning or like I get up and go to the gym. But like to me, a walk, I'm like reminded that there's beauty in the world and that there's like goddesses. Yes. And I'm just walking along with my little dog. This is the best, best time of his life is when I take him on a walk in the morning and I'm like, he loves it. The only time he has that's fun in the day is when I take him on a walk and it's just like you have this like, yes. Re invigoration for life.
Leslie Johnston [00:36:23]:
And you're like, oh, I Like that getting up a little earlier, maybe. The thing you said is really struck me and as like a light bulb moment for me today is me feeling a little bit like I haven't been accomplishing anything, even though I have, like, stuff that I'm doing. I'm in the preparation season for, like, the next set of events. And although it's like, it feels like the list still never ends and you're working through it because there's no, like, accomplishment factor. You do feel like, what am I even doing? Like, this is worth. Like, this isn't even doing anything. And I think you're right. Like, actually we think, oh, I'm going to be so burned out during the crazy parts of life.
Leslie Johnston [00:37:04]:
But I think it's opposite for me. I'm like, when I have time where I'm just more in the preparation phase, where it's still a lot of work but I'm not getting to see any of the results, it's like, you just start to go, like, what am I even doing? Is this even working?
Morgan May Treuil [00:37:19]:
It's a very lopsided schedule that you have. There's seasons where you see all the fulfillment, and there's seasons where you see none. It's just grind and work. But someone once said that one of the, like, the tells of burnout is you feel guilt over not doing things or not producing.
Leslie Johnston [00:37:39]:
Yes.
Morgan May Treuil [00:37:40]:
And I think that that's. That's part of the accomplishment.
Leslie Johnston [00:37:43]:
Yes.
Morgan May Treuil [00:37:43]:
Like, factor that I'm having to work through is like, okay, not only am I not accomplishing things right now, I need to figure out a better way to define if I'm doing a good job, but what's wrong with me to where I feel guilty over not doing something this summer, you know, like, yeah, I felt guilty yesterday. I drove up to middle school camp and spoke yesterday morning, and I had to leave at like, five because it's really early and it's far away. So we got back by like, two, too. And I had this whole hour where I was like, tied in knots of guilt over the fact that I didn't come back into the office and work on retreat stuff. And it's like, well, you just worked like, five.
Leslie Johnston [00:38:26]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:38:26]:
Like, you just. And you just did all of that, you know, like, it's like, I don't know. There's something wrong with that too. That's like a bad rest mindset where you think, like, I'm not allowed to be still because then. Then you realize, oh, my motivation surrounding work is wrong. If I feel bad about being still.
Leslie Johnston [00:38:43]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:38:44]:
When you're never still.
Leslie Johnston [00:38:45]:
No. And we need to stop, like, you know yourself and you know, like, you can take stock for yourself of like, am I being lazy in this season or am I coming off of like a grind season? And now I'm guilting myself that my body and my soul needs to rest.
Morgan May Treuil [00:39:03]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:39:04]:
Like, maybe God's actually asking you to rest because you just came off of something.
Morgan May Treuil [00:39:08]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:39:09]:
And instead you're guilting yourself into it.
Morgan May Treuil [00:39:11]:
Yeah. And if you're a human being, I.
Leslie Johnston [00:39:12]:
Find myself doing that all the time.
Morgan May Treuil [00:39:14]:
Yes.
Leslie Johnston [00:39:15]:
And putting that on other people. I'll be honest, sometimes I put too much expectation on other people because in my mind it's like, oh, well, you should be able to do this, this and this. And it's like, you know, I feel like I need more grace for myself and for other people. When it's like, God didn't design us to work this like crazy. We're always on, we're always achieving 100% at our jobs. We're always. Now you should still put, like, you still put in effort and all that. And you care and you are behind what you do.
Leslie Johnston [00:39:50]:
But the more you read in the Bible, the more it's like, oh, God's actually really asked people to like, take a Sabbath and like, learn how to rest. Learn how to work hard, but learn how to rest. And so when we get mad at ourselves for the thing that God asked us to do, we probably should start rethinking how we feel about that.
Morgan May Treuil [00:40:10]:
Everything that runs in life has a fuel up moment. It's just the way of the universe. It's like cars have to stop for gas. Teslas have to stop to charge. Animals have to get fed, Human beings have to get fed. Plants have to get watered. A fire has to get like started. Right.
Morgan May Treuil [00:40:35]:
It's like everything and then it always dies. Like every. There is nothing that is continuous, continuous output except for God. And so it's funny because I think human beings, our expectation is like continuous output. That's how I measure if I'm, if I'm successful or not.
Leslie Johnston [00:40:52]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:40:52]:
But I think what we need to start doing is like, you look at your salary and you think this salary is, is, is given to me because of my continuous output seven days a week. That if you're not God and you're not a machine, not even, not, not even the machines can go without being charged. Right. So if you're not God, then part of what you are getting paid for is to get recharged. Well, so that you can output? Well, yes, because you have no use to the organization if you're not charged.
Leslie Johnston [00:41:24]:
Well, yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:41:26]:
So human beings are the only ones that are applying this standard of output only. No charge, no fuel up.
Leslie Johnston [00:41:33]:
Yes.
Morgan May Treuil [00:41:33]:
We are the only ones that have that standard put on us.
Leslie Johnston [00:41:36]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:41:36]:
And it's not doing us any favors. Like if you think you're the hero of your organization and you can't stop moving because you're the hero and you have, you're into integral to the operation, you're eventually not going to be the hero of the organization because you're going to suck at your job because you're going to be exhausted and not have any new ideas.
Leslie Johnston [00:41:54]:
That's true.
Morgan May Treuil [00:41:55]:
You have to get fueled and charged, watered. And if you don't do that, then. Yeah, but I'm saying this to myself, knowing that I don't do that.
Leslie Johnston [00:42:06]:
Yeah. And it's like when you are charged up, then figure out what do you feel like God is asking you to do? And maybe that is working really hard at your job when you're fueled up and that's doing a new project, something above and beyond or whatever. And then being willing to go for it and be like, I'm gonna use this and center this energy the right way. And then when it's time to recharge again, you're ready to recharge. But that takes a lot of like setting aside your people pleasing skills and your thinking that like this can't run without me. And it actually takes a lot of humility, I think, to rest because you.
Morgan May Treuil [00:42:48]:
Have to go is so good and.
Leslie Johnston [00:42:50]:
So profound because you have to go. I'm not the most integral part of this. I actually can release some of this to God and God's actually requiring me to do this.
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:03]:
It's pride if you're not resting.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:05]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:05]:
Because you think that you're endless.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:07]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:07]:
And you're not.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:08]:
No.
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:10]:
So we're prideful. Until this week.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:14]:
Until this week.
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:15]:
That's really good. It's a humility and it's worship to be like, I'm not God, I'm not limitless.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:21]:
Yeah. Yeah. It's true.
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:23]:
That's great.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:25]:
Well, this was good. I'm excited to go on vacation.
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:27]:
For me. I know, me too.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:28]:
Which actually when this airs, we'll be back from vacation.
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:30]:
So maybe some people will be starting theirs though.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:33]:
Yeah, I hope so. So I hope that you feel like less guilted if you're also tired in the summer and you're like, oh, thank God. I thought it was just me but inspired to, like, rest the right way. Cause that's what Morgan and I are gonna try to do. And then when you are recharged to be like, okay, what is priority for me?
Morgan May Treuil [00:43:55]:
Yeah.
Leslie Johnston [00:43:55]:
Like, when I'm recharged, I'm not just gonna go back to my old ways of, like, people pleasing. It's like, I wanna recharge when at the end of my life, I can look back and go, yes. I put my energy towards, like, the important things in my life.
Morgan May Treuil [00:44:08]:
Yep. So, yeah. And hopefully you're. You feel more freed up from accomplishment based.
Leslie Johnston [00:44:15]:
Yeah.
Morgan May Treuil [00:44:15]:
Living at all times. Because not every season has that.
Leslie Johnston [00:44:18]:
Yeah. I mean, it talks about, like, in scripture, how it's like, seek first the kingdom of God and all these things will be added to you. So even beyond, like, your job and your family and all of those things, all those things are so important, I do think you gotta ask God, like, reveal to me what, like, seeking your kingdom looks like and what does that actually look like for my life? Because then you promise to add these things after that. So that'd be good.
Morgan May Treuil [00:44:49]:
So good.
Leslie Johnston [00:44:50]:
This is great.
Morgan May Treuil [00:44:50]:
I know. I feel convicted and encouraged.
Leslie Johnston [00:44:53]:
Yeah, me too.
Morgan May Treuil [00:44:54]:
Love it. Well, thanks, you guys, for joining us on the Am I doing this Right podcast.
Leslie Johnston [00:44:58]:
Yeah. Go turn off your phone and then relax for a little bit.
Morgan May Treuil [00:45:02]:
Go rest.
Leslie Johnston [00:45:02]:
Go rest.
Morgan May Treuil [00:45:04]:
Okay.
Leslie Johnston [00:45:04]:
All right, we'll see you next week.
Morgan May Treuil [00:45:06]:
Bye.